Necropsy of Ward-umilitaion

Friday, May 04, 2012 Sidrah Latif 1 Comments Category :

It is hard to share, even harder to strike the words on keyboard, but I have to get it out of my system.

Bisti comes to you at the most unexpected of all times, when you are least prepared for it, it will suddenly pop up and dance in your face. LIKE A BOSS!
It all started today in OPD. It was 11:52 am to be exact (I had just checked my cell for that matter). Dr. ABC was about to leave us for the day, since as always he had diagnosed a patient to be functional. After his every Friday ritualistic lecture urging us to find a patient who came for follow-up next time instead of a new case, he went into the side room of OPD room no. 34. As we were picking up our bag and steps he suddenly called us forward. Pulling a final year boy along with him he demanded one of the girls to step forward as well. Final year’s so helpful bajis (yes I mean it sarcastically!) asked the Doc to take fourth year as a scape goat. Qissa Mukhtasir (since detailed version is baat hai ruswai ki) I was asked to step forward.
Problem: I have never done anything on a patient in a ward.
Cause: We could not attend medicine ward last year because of our send-up prep leaves.
Aggravating factors: I had bunked 8 ward days out of total of 18 in current class.
Dilemma: The Doc asked me to palpate patient’s abdomen.
Injustice: How was I to know that patient had an enlarged spleen?
Ultimate embarrassment: “Sir normal ha abdomen! Doughy feeling ha although!”
The laugh(that others had): The doc:”hum pehchaan jatay hain who palpate abdomen for findings and those who palpate objectively dramay-bazi kay liye!”
Solution: Have an aptitude test before allowing anyone to enter premises of medical institutions, otherwise disasters like me will happen annually.
Strangely: It feels good after pouring it out. :-/



  1. Perfect description yar! ye hai kahani ghar ghar ki :))